twinkle-khanna

The witty wife of Akshay Kumar just turned another year older today. We can all agree that Twinkle Khanna is a sharp woman, who doesn’t  mince her words and is a prolific writer now.

To celebrate her 43rd birthday, we’ve listed down some of her funniest and the most outrageous things that Mrs. Funnybones ever said:

“A wise woman keeps her hands firmly in her pockets and does not accidentally unzip anything, including her mouth.”

“There are 146 countries above us where the men have longer lifespans, and the biggest blow is that even with four wives who don’t fast for them, the Arab men outlive our good old Indian dudes.”

“Menstruating doesn’t cause pickles to spoil, temples to collapse or food to rot, nor is it contagious, though it would be rather nice to infect the male population with this so-called ‘curse’ for a month or two, just to sit back and view what I am sure would be a highly entertaining spectacle.”

“Our little satellite reached Mars because it was called MOM. If it was called DAD, it would still be circling the Earth, lost, but not willing to ask for directions.”

“Universe is not your rakhi brother to give you gifts.”

“Nothing in life is sacred except laughter.”

“My husband has extra inches…in height, which the other actors don’t have.”

“Radhe Maa’s life should be made into a reality show. I have a fascination for her.”

“I have not been on Koffee With Karan because my husband was scared that the first word I utter would be penis and he wouldn’t want me to say penis penis penis.”

“I don’t think I can find an elephant head in time to make him my little Ganesha. Parvati had divine powers to join the head with her son’s body whereas I will have to plonk an orange pumpkin on top of his torso and try my luck with spit and good old Fevicol.”

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